A few months ago, before dying and weddings and celebrations and Christmas, I mentioned we were trying to make Mr. Thomas and me more than a party of two. I mentioned it'd been many 28-day long cycles of waiting and hope and disappointment. I wanted to say I've received all kinds of sweet advice and unwarranted opinion and showered myself in a thick wash of frustration. I wished I could say I know 2016 holds our babe.
That's the way we answer those when are you going to have kids already? questions. That's how we name this season of our life -because how we love to give our seasons a name. Trying is what we call our wishes and dreams and desires in short. With the word trying, we summarize childhood dreams, thousands of conversations, a gaggle of thoughts about what it would mean to be called mama.
How often are we willing to try for our dreams?
Because, we call ourselves holy and we pray, we encourage each other into still solitary reflections on the future. We make it a mysterious place that exists only in abstract. We ask for others to slow down beside us, to embrace a stilled pace, to stop. We want to talk about far away futures, about then and not now, about whats to come. But what if your life needs you to try in this season? What if the answer to your prayers is a movement in any direction so He can bless your path?
What if you're being called to try?
That art shop, the novel buried deep in your soul, the blog you're ignoring, the friendship that feels too far away, the community for which you ache, the marriage that needs revamping, the home you can't stand to call your own. It's haunting you, bringing you to your knees with unrealized potential, and so, you need to give it a try.
Some seasons are try-hard.
The bible is full of try hard lives. Peter, Paul, Joshua, Jesus. Calling, purpose, try. Try, try, try with all their God-loving, dream-making, soul-thirsting might. A pastor told my eighteen-year-old self that picking my college was far easier than I was making it. He said, "pick your direction and then take Him with you." And He followed me there to fraternity parties and dorm rooms, to office jobs and food halls. Then He followed me home.
He knew I tried as an honor to Him.
Sometimes waiting on our dream doesn't call for stillness, but instead begs us to try with the whole of our hearts. And we can, we can try, try again. We can try for babies and for businesses and for blogs. We can try for community and for church and for cars to drive. We can try for justice and for jobs and for joy. We can try for marriages and for meal plans and for so much more.
Go on, give it a try.