Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Where I Come From: A Tribute to my Birthday Boy

I've decided to semi-quasi take up the Blogtember Challenge over at Jenni's Story of My Life. Semi-quasi, because I'm not doing every single prompt. I have stories I want to write, pressing emotions that need to come out here in order to be healed, and inklings that won't die until they're seen through in words. But, and it's a big one, her topics fascinated me in so many ways, so I will do the ones and I want and skip the others for semi-regular Mr. Thomas and Me programming.

Today the prompt: 
Describe where or what you came from.

Initially, I thought of my small town, my big family, my good God, my bad anxiety, my conservative religious background, my education fueled by my love for reading. And, while those are all good and bad and in between, I knew the day didn't call for those. 

On the third day of September, it called for celebration of the man who made me Mrs. Thomas. It seems fitting to honor the place he created in our marriage that allowed me to grow into the woman I am today. Because, though it's been (a week short of) two fast and furious years of marriage, I'm not the woman he said yes to just one hundred and four weeks ago. I'm a better, more balanced, less impulsive, more lovely woman who's  
I grew up being "one of the boys". From elementary school onward, I was everyone's little sister, best friend (stuck in the friend zone), dear classmate, but few saw me in a romantic light. Not one man looked at me the way he did that first time we talked. His smile warm, his hair beach-y blonde, his muscles well-defined: what's a girl to do. And, he saw me, at that very moment, as a possible future Mrs. T. Little did we know

One year and fifty one weeks after our beautiful wedding day, he's changed me all the more. I come from a dating relationship tested by the fire of anxiety and illness into a marriage refined by the goodness of a gentle, God-fearing spirit who knows so deeply how to care for another more than his self. 
Pre-Thomas, I was hard on myself -physically, emotionally, spiritually. And that was hurtful. The process of grace was hard and fought through and through, but, Jason's patient and gentle nature ensured I saw myself in a shade of light similar to his. His ability to affirm without being mushy (because it makes me awkward and uncomfortable) taught me that we can have love languages all our own not understood by anyone else. He's showed how marriage can come in many shapes and forms, but that ours is just right for us
I come from a marriage that showed me how caring for others can, in turn, be caring for yourself. Watching the man I love, love the men I grew up beside fills every bursting seem of my heart. In those moments shared between three crazy boys, I see how his caring for them is, in turn, care for me. And, I know, that care is what makes us family. Though he isn't fussing over my needs and wants, he is investing in me. How proud I am to come from that. 
I come from a marriage where there's a balance between us and me. Where it's not always about the cumulative, but, at times, is about the individuals. Time for me to do what girls do, space for him to be his testosterone-filled self is vital, life-giving, and marriage preserving, but not simply found. So, those opportunities are seeked, created, and celebrated. As we part ways, we wish each other a good time, enjoy those moments with kindred spirits, then reunite with joy and excitement about our differences.
I come from a marriage established by love and held together by humor. He taught me that this marital adventure is better when it comes with a laugh and, at times, a stiff drink. When things are too serious and we feel exhausted, laughter is the best medicine. And, when we can't laugh at ourselves, we're doing something wrong because life really isn't that serious. 
I come from a marriage that's founded on Him, that's filled with His grace -though there are times that grace seems non-existent. I come from a marriage where I'm being lifted up. Where Jason's taken it upon himself to encourage me to fill others rather than myself because he will do his damnedest to ensure my portion. Though he's imperfect and our attempts sometimes fail, God's changed me through him. 

A marriage based on His perfect love and filled with our imperfect, 
but ever-trying journey, that's where I come from. 
Happy birthday Mr. T!
My love for you runs deep, much like your love for cake and beef jerky, but richer still. 

8 comments:

  1. Well, you've done it. You've made me cry. This was beautiful. I dont think you realize how similar we are. I love your love for Jason. I hope you both enjoy a wonderful day celebrating.

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  2. This is beautiful! Such a wonderful, loving relationship! Happy anniversary :)

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  3. Girl, how similar our names are makes me realize we were made the same from a very early age. Do you think God was knitting us together in our mothers' wombs and said, I know who's going to be so good for you? I do.

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  4. Thank you Margaret. It's so fun to celebrate his birthday and our marriage in such close quarters! :)

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  5. Hey Mrs. T, I'm a new follower on from the GFC hop. Love love story is awesome! You also were very pretty during your wedding day! Plus, love the blog layout! :)

    I'd love it if you can follow me back :)

    xoxo

    Cheat Weekend : Cafe by the Ruins

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  6. And you are the most wonderful Mrs T ever made! I am so proud of you friend, how you have grown and nurtured into this special being and wife. We are all blessed to know you and have you in our lives. I thank God for where you came from... x

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  7. Love you Cal. Of course, I'm still learning what being Mrs. T means and that's not an easy task, but thankfully God and Jason are men full of grace and patience! :)

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  8. I think this was a lovely way to honor Mr. T and the way he's made his way into your heart. Isn't it funny how those we need to most seem to complete our souls in ways we never knew possible? God blesses us with those moments when we understand His plan for us and allows us to enjoy the love and laughter. Life may not always be perfect, but it's it's perfect for you two. Happy birthday, Mr. T! (belated at least)

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