Saturday, July 20, 2013

We're Off to a Wedding, Thus it's Only Appropriate to Talk About Marriage

Mama Bird and I are off to a wedding this weekend. I'm thrilled to be attending as her Plus One... It'll be wedded bliss with a major serving of Girls' Weekend. Holler for the wine-drinking, goat cheese-eating, late night giggling that's about to ensure.

I've always enjoyed weddings. But now that I'm a married folk myself, I love weddings. The flowers, the tulle and sparkles, the vows, the music, the dancing, the drinking, the love. Mostly, I love that I'm not the one getting married because that fuss over me is not so much my style.
Our wedding was beautiful and fun and full of loveliness. I wrote our vows. Yep, Jason's and mine. I have the knack for words, him numbers, so we agreed I'd write them. And we loved them. (Truth be told: Jason had no problem with his, I forgot mine part way through...)

As I remember the moments we shared those vows, I knew wholeheartedly what they meant in that moment in time. Now two years later, they are deeper, stronger, and yet, more challenging.

I love you, Jason Edward, and I thank the Lord for the love that has bound our hearts 
and lives together in spiritual fellowship of marriage. 
I will love, honor, cherish and obey you always. 
As we enter upon the privileges and joys of life's most holy relationship 
and begin together the great adventure of building a Christian home, 
I will look to you as head of our home as I have looked to 
Christ as Head of the Church. 
I will love you in sickness as in health, in poverty as in wealth, 
in sorrow as in joy, and will be true to you by God's grace, 
trusting in Him, so long as we both shall live.­­­­­

It was easy to say in sickness as in health -until you watch a 25 year marriage end sharply and sadly in the throes of dementia, until you watch mental health issues tear through a marriage that seemed it would go the distance. In poverty as in wealth seems easy enough -until you watch stably employed friends lose their jobs and with it their house, until a crashed car becomes a heated center of arguments that don't seem to end. 
We are hanging out at "in sorrow as in joy". Oh, the sorrow. And yet, oh, the joy. Some days we talk easily, comfortably about any and everything... Those are the days we fall asleep giggling like giddy school children. Others I am withdrawn and introspective, longing for quiet to be with my emotions and my God... Nights that are long and muted and hard for Jason to understand why the hell I'm being so difficult. But, regardless of the sorrow or joy, the love has deepened, has multiplied to something larger than I ever imagined, has been a saving grace for my, at times, anxious, lonely heart
Married friends, it's great right? Not always circumstantially, but in the retrospect it's great. And so you embrace and seek what's next for you two

Engaged friends (there's so many of you), it's beautiful, marriage, it is. It's not what you expect or could predict, and that's the best part: the profound mystery that awaits you.

Single friends, don't rush. Marriage is lovely and wondrous. But not something you want to do with just anyone. Trust me. Plus, there's a lot of consideration that goes into everyday choices you can just make. You've got to be ready for that... And some of you aren't

Speaking of vows, have you read this?
It's so encouraging and refreshing for my mind and my heart. 

Congratulations Matt and Amy. 
You're going to do the Cuny name well.
I'm thrilled to celebrate this moment in life with the two of you... 
And to see the many moments your marriage will hold. 


  1. You are one inspiring married lady and one gorgeous wife x

  2. Yes I just stalked your blog for wedding photos. LOVE! I will share our vows eventually too! Love that you wrote both of yours! haha


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